Waiting

It was the persistent uncertainty of everything that caused Evelyn to so dislike this world, to feel its cold, unfriendly embrace. No place to trust, not much joy living alone so long now; mostly she looked for distractions. Thirty-one already, forgotten in a cubicle in a big building in a big city, she blames no one, remains hopeful, although wary. But, too young to feel so disconnected.

They met online, a chat room Evelyn dared visit on occasion. Some good conversation started, and grew to something more over weeks of late night texting. Now, the first meeting in person, Evelyn finally agreed, with mixed feelings of danger and anticipation. Both charged for a plan of first walking, then lunch, if things went that well.

Now, waiting. Heart beating, and the constant second-guessing. Her life was just fine already, she thought. Why would Evelyn care to risk a disruption of her security? Now Ethan, her online friend, was almost fifteen minutes late. Maybe traffic? Should she call, or text? Just be cool? For how long? More uncertainty. There's always more of it. It's this. This is why, Evelyn again remembered, waiting.